Wish Machine Broke

1.5M ratings
277k ratings

See, that’s what the app is perfect for.

Sounds perfect Wahhhh, I don’t wanna
natashafromfallout
theradioghost

I STEPPED OUTSIDE OF THE FRONT DOOR OF MY OWN HOME ONLY TO FIND THE DEER THAT TRIED TO KICK MY ASS LAST YEAR STANDING RIGHT THERE IN MY FRONT YARD. BOLD AS BRASS.

AM I NOT SAFE ANYWHERE ANYMORE

theradioghost

for those of you who were not here last year: this deer is the most obnoxious, unnatural red-orange color I’ve ever seen, only appears when it’s raining, and once chased me a quarter mile through the woods. her name is Hot Cheeto Hatred and she is my nemesis

galuby

dude, i think that’s a fairy

roadhogsbigbelly
brainrotdotorg

i am never talking to a cishet person again. did you know some of these people believe that watching porn is cheating

brainrotdotorg

queers are out here having five dimensional sex and cishets are living in the stone age...... we have to enlighten them......

brainrotdotorg

#I know a guy whose ex made him stop masturbating cause she said it counted as cheating

WE HAVE TO FUCKING HELP THEM WHAT DO YOU MEAN MASTURBATING IS CHEATING . CHEATING WITH WHO.